You're proposing on the first date

We asked for a full interview. He said no. So we took the 20 minutes, and left with something worth far more than footage.

Twenty minutes. That's all Brian Marks would give us.

We're in Kelowna wrapping Unbecoming, final interviews with Nic, Fehren, Jesse, and Kristina. As part of the trip, we wanted to capture quick conversations with people whose lives had been dramatically changed by 5-MeO, potentially for use in the documentary's opening hook.

Brian was on our list.

He's the personal trainer and Instagram coach doing over $1M/month in ARR leveraging his audience.

The guy posts seven times daily on Instagram and sleeps at 7pm. His schedule is locked tight.

Every time we asked for proper interview time, setup, interview, b-roll, we got a polite no. "I can give you 20 minutes."

So instead of pushing harder, we decided to meet him where he was at.

We took the small yes. Drove to his house. Set up in his basement after work, before dinner. None of it was "ideal", not the location, not the lighting, not the timeframe. But we took the yes.

Then we did something that might seem crazy when you only have 20 minutes: we spent the first three watching our sizzle reel together.

He's agreed because he was Nic's friend and was changed by his 5MEO experience, but he knew nothing about the film we were there to make...

When you're pressed for time, burning 15% of it showing your trailer feels risky. But for us, this is the key to enrollment. We needed Brian to see the larger opportunity, what this was actually about.

He watched it, looked up, and smiled. "That's fucking fire."

The energy completely changed. The interview was off the charts.

But here's where it gets interesting. After we wrapped, we didn't rush out. We stayed. Chatted about his story, his bigger goals. We offered feedback on how to push his narrative to reach the audience size he wanted. We challenged him, friendly, genuine, and actually drove value.

Walking to the van, Brian looked at us and said, "You're world-class."

Back at the Airbnb, Evan texted him. Explained he was such a strong character that we'd need more time to properly integrate him into the film.

His response? An invitation to join him at 5am and follow his entire morning for four hours, workout, meetings, time with family.

By the end of it all, Brian asked about making a film himself. How much it would cost.

Twenty minutes became four hours. A polite no became an open door. And we didn't push once.

We started small. Drove value. Built the relationship. And let each yes naturally lead to a larger one.

Many of us date for years before getting married. Yet with clients, we want to slap them with a marriage proposal on the first date. Then we wonder why we get ghosted.

Every big yes is actually a chain of smaller yeses stacked together. When we operate out of fear, uncertainty, or over-excitement, we try to compress that chain into a single moment.

We go for the big close too fast, and get shut out.

Here's the reframe:

Instead of asking "How do I close this deal?" ask "What's the smallest yes I can get right now that opens the door to a conversation?"

Map your ideal client relationship backward:

Yes #5: They hire you for the big project

Yes #4: They invite you to pitch or scope

Yes #3: They engage with your ideas or content meaningfully

Yes #2: They give you time, a call, a coffee, a conversation

Yes #1: They acknowledge your existence (a reply, a follow, a comment)

Most people try to jump from Yes #1 to Yes #5. That's the marriage proposal on the first date.

Your application this week:

Think about one relationship you're trying to develop, a dream client, a potential collaborator, someone whose door you want to open. Instead of planning your pitch, plan your pathway.

What are the five smaller yeses that could lead to the big one?

Write them down.

Then focus only on getting to Yes #2 this week. Drive value at every step. Let the relationship breathe.

You know what I love most about that moment with Brian?

He called us "world-class", not because of our gear, our Emmys, or our client list.

But because of how it felt to be around us.

That's the goal with every interaction. Leave people feeling seen. Feeling valued. Feeling like they just spent time with someone who genuinely cared about their story, not just their signature on a contract.

The small yeses aren't a strategy. They're how you build a career full of people who actually want to work with you.

Until next week, keep starting small, keep driving value, keep choosing who you're becoming.

• Patrick